Do your best and surrender the rest has been my daily mantra for the last couple of years because, for the vast majority of my life, I have been my own worst critic.
I was a Lawyer in my previous career and this short story sums up just how hard I was on myself.
Many years ago, as a young Lawyer, I´m proud to say that I won the first trial of my career. It was only a small case but the win should have given me a huge boost. Instead, I focused on one tiny error I´d made that was so small, it didn´t make a difference to the outcome. Instead of patting myself on the back, I crucified myself for this mistake for months to come. I had a very negative habit of setting the bar so high for myself that I always felt liked I´d failed.
I´d put myself under tremendous pressure to achieve, to do everything right. There was no room for failure. Indeed, I´ve come to realise that I was a perfectionist who couldn´t ever get it right. I was ridiculously unfair to myself.
In the last few years, I´ve finally dropped the bar to a more realistic level. I´m very firm yet kind to myself. I make mistakes and I own them. I learn from them. I understand that my personal growth depends upon these mistakes. AIl that I ask of myself is that I do my best and surrender the rest.
I see a lot of other people, especially women, who are far too hard on themselves. People who are big achievers who have set their personal bar so high that they always feel like they have failed.
If you, like me, are your own worst critic, it´s time to be firm yet kind with yourself. Firm enough to drop the high expectations that you place on yourself and kind enough to let yourself make mistakes. You can only do your best, my friends. Surrender all the rest.
Join me on a wild adventure on the Portuguese Camino de Santiago. We´ll walk the way together and see what magic awaits us. Visit my Camino de Santiago page or click the link below for full details.
(c) Samantha Wilson 2018. All Rights Reserved.